The P Word

Since returning home, well if I must be completely honest, I've always had an issue with pride. I use my pride as an excuse not to do the things God calls me to do. The last position I held was in the preschool department of the church my family attends. I loved it! I loved the organization. I loved the children. I loved the teachers. Sure, like every job, there were some down sides, but mostly I loved it! When God called me away from it, I didn't want to obey. I was doing a good job. Why would He call me away from a job I was doing well? I was in His house, doing His work. Pride! That was my main problem. It wasn't the "I want attention" pride. If you know me, I am not one that wants attention. I don't want recognition. The pride that I was filled with was selfish pride. The pride of knowing I could do the job and do it well.

Now that I am no longer working in the preschool department, I have found it difficult being around the department. It is hard to walk away from something I loved so dearly. It is hard to walk away because of pride.

May the LORD cut off all flattering lips, and the tongue that speaks proud things. Psalm 12:3

The one who has a haughty look and a proud heart. Him I will not endure. Psalm 101:5

Though the LORD is on high, yet He regards the lowly; but the proud He knows from afar. Psalm 138:6

Everyone proud in heart is an abomination to the LORD. Proverbs 16:5

.... God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble. 1 Peter 5:5

Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world - the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life - it is not of the Father but is of the world. 1John 2:15

These verses all show us how much God dislikes pride. Pride is an abomination to the LORD! I often try to justify my pride by thinking "I am only being prideful around my husband, no-one else, so it's okay". Really? Psalm 138:6 proves me wrong there. "but the proud He knows from afar". God knows when we are being prideful. If we are having prideful thoughts, He knows. God's work cannot be done for yourself, or by yourself, it can only be done for Him and by Him. Everything I do in life should be for His glory, not mine.

When God called me home to homeschool His children that are in my care, I didn't want to do it. Why? Because I know I can't. Pride. Teaching His children will be all Him. I cannot possibly do it. I will need to get all my strength, knowledge, love, patience, everything, from Him and Him alone.

I know of people who do not want to serve in certain areas because of the people who are leading those areas. I have been one of those people. Pride. Simply, pride. We don't serve the people who are leading, we serve God and God alone. If we use the excuse of not liking the person who is leading, or not agreeing with the way the person leads, we are just being disobedient. We serve for God's glory. If that is truly what is in our hearts, then who leads isn't important. God's glory and obedience to Him is all that matters.

"And you shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength. This is the first commandment. And the second, like it, is this: 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself.' There is no other commandment greater than these." Mark 12:30-31

We are to love God first and foremost. Pride gets in the way of that. Second, we are to love our neighbors as we love ourselves. If we aren't serving because of who is leading, then we aren't loving our neighbor as we love ourselves. You don't know what purpose God has for you when you serve. Part or all of your serving could be to show the leader God's love.

My prayer is that I don't let my pride get in the way of serving my Heavenly Father. It is a daily struggle. A struggle I need to lift up to Him. The last thing I want to do is have God resist me because of my pride. I pray daily that I be humbled.