Tuesday, February 7, 2012

My Spirit Is Lifted

I haven't blogged in awhile. I haven't felt like it. I have been suffocating in self-pity for the past week.

Since we announced that we are adopting, I have been met with reactions I didn't anticipate. I remember when I announced each of my pregnancies, it was received with excitement and encouragement. I thought that would be the case when we announced our adoption too. After all, we are being blessed with a son. That is exciting, right?

Since I didn't expect it, it was rather difficult for me to digest. I got angry, I got depressed, I was hurt. I have spent the week just being sad. I spent the week doubting.

Things are not going as I thought they would.

Hmmm, did you read that last sentence? There in lies the problem.

Things are not supposed to go the way I think they should go. Things are supposed to go the way He has planned. 

This morning, before my husband left for work, he told me about his quiet time. His words were so encouraging. I realized so many things this morning as he was talking to me. And since then God has shown me so much more.

My realizations not only came from my husband, but I have been listening to worship music this morning and every song has been an encouragement.

In Christ alone ... He can move mountains ... The more I seek You ... Empty Me ... I just want to wait on you, my God ... Monster ... (okay, that last one was more of how I was feeling before)

The Lord spoke to me through my husband and through worship music. My spirit is lifted. I know that we are doing His will and that is all that matters.

Yes, we may loose friends. Yes, our families may not understand or agree with us adopting.

But we are doing His will!

2 comments:

  1. The people who love you just love you.

    I know that the wording sounds strange and maybe less than poetic, but it's really just that simple. Some of these poor reactions may be a chance for God to offer your friends and family a way to learn how to love you better or to fail at the challenge that love is. I pray for the people in your life to meet the challenge and to let love and God be the ruler in their life.

    You are doing the right thing when you are letting positive feelings lead your decisions - love, courage, wisdom, etc. You tell negative feelings they have no place - no to fear, no to hate, no to ignorance, no to apathy.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you for your encouragement! It is greatly appreciated. :)

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