Home with Tracy

Dear Adoptive Mom Who Didn't Adopt, It is difficult to express the loss of a child through a failed adoption. It is difficult for people to understand. But I am here to let you know that I understand. I understand your pain. I understand your loss. I have felt your heartbreak. I have cried your tears. You don't start the process of an adoption thinking the end result would be a bed that is still empty. You don't think that there will be a seat at the table that wont be filled. You don't think of all the goodnight kisses that will never be given. You don't think that you will never give comforting hugs, letting your child know you will always be there mommy. You don't start the process of an adoption thinking you will come out at the end without your child. It is difficult because the people around you may not respond to your loss. They may not realize that you are grieving the loss of that child. Your child. They may not realize that even though you never ...

There are three things I remember from last year's birthday. All of them have to do with loss. First, all of our kids made me paper airplanes with China written on them. We were in the process of adopting Lucas. He was already in my heart and I couldn't wait to hold him in my arms. We were just getting the last paperwork together to finish up our home study and our dossier. I thought it would only be a few more months until I could see him, hold him, love him, comfort him. Second, I received a message from my youngest brother on Facebook. He asked me if it was my birthday or my husband's, since we share a joint Facebook account. I laughed because I always get his birthday and our other brother's birthday mixed up. We message back and forth a few times. It was so sweet. We didn't get to grow up together. I think it was the first time he had ever wished me a happy birthday. Third, I remember that I did not receive a phone call from my grandma to tell me happy bi...

We have come to the decision to stop the adoption process of Lucas. It was not a decision that we came to quickly. It was not an easy decision. It was a decision that breaks the heart of each one of us in our family. We have shed many tears and I am sure we will shed many more. Our children still include him in their prayers every night and talk about him often. To us, he was already a member of our family. There are many factors that we took into consideration before making this decision. We are all hurting and feeling the loss of this precious little boy. We already had Lucas in our home and our hearts. I cry when I look at his bed that we already had made for him, just waiting for him to come home so we could tuck him in. Even though we feel this is the right decision, there is a big part of me that is still hoping and praying for a miracle to happen so we can bring him home. I am not going to go into great detail about the specifics. If you would like to know more, please...

Our friends, Kevin and Debbie, are in the process of adopting from the Democratic Republic of the Congo . You can follow their adoption journey at  Forever By Grace .  They have been accepted to be the featured family this week (Feb 26-Mar 3) with an organization called Give1 Save1 . Basically, people donate $1 towards their adoption fund and if 1000 people give $1 then that’s $1000 that goes to bringing home their baby! What a great organization and a great way for us all to work together to support adoption. I ask that you please consider helping our friends bring their baby home. Also, please fell free to share this post so that others may also help. Please consider helping support their adoption and give $1 to the Weldon's this week! Click  here.   Thank you!!!

We have been pre-approved less than a week and in that short time God has put us in touch with several other families who have adopted or are currently adopting a child from Maria's Big House of Hope. Now that we have been pre-approved, we are going to start raising funds to bring our son home. We already received our first donation. The donation was from someone we just met through Facebook. God is good! For our first fundraiser, we are asking you to become a piece of the puzzle that brings Lucas home. We are having this picture of Lucas made into a 1000 piece puzzle.  We are asking for a $5 donation to sponsor a piece of the puzzle. When you sponsor a piece of the puzzle, we will write your name on the back of a puzzle piece. Once all the pieces have sponsors, we will put the puzzle together, frame it and hang it in Lucas' room so he can see it when he comes home. The puzzle picture will be a constant reminder of God's work and how He used so many people to help brin...

I just received a call I have been waiting months to receive. WE ARE PRE-APPROVED! We have been the green light to adopt Lucas. Meet Lucas..... We are so excited! Follow our new journey  here.

Sunday at church, God sent a message through the pastor that I needed to hear.  The message was from the first chapter in the book of Nehemiah. Nehemiah prayed.  He prayed that God would be attentive and hear his prayer.  He prayed and confessed his sins.  He acknowledged his wrongdoings.  He asked for a miracle.  The pastor was talking about a new building project that the church is about to start.  He talked about his fear.  He talked about the fear of taking on such a big project.  That comforted me. I felt comforted because I have had fear over turning in our adoption application.  I have felt guilty because I had fear.  We see no way that we will get approved to adopt.  We see no way that we can afford to adopt.  We see obstacles.  We have doubt. The pastor was talking about miracles that God can perform.  He said "I don't want to get to heaven and have God show me a room that is full and when I as...

I was recently contacted by  Forgotten Voices . Their organization has a mission ... "to demonstrate the love of Christ by equipping local churches in southern Africa to meet the physical and spiritual needs of children orphaned by AIDS in their communities." They sent me a link to one of their Thanksgiving Cubes that they created for children in order to encourage children to think of how they can give back to others.  What a great idea! I printed off the children's cube and right away my 8 year wanted to complete it.  He took it in his room, answered the questions, completed the dot-to-dot, colored it and taped it together.  He loved it.  I liked it because it made him reflect on what he can be thankful for when it comes to our family.  I liked how it made him reflect on what he could do to help other kids. I liked how it told him a story of a child a little older than him and how he was blessed by received 2 rabbits.  We teach our ch...

Since November is National Adoption Month, I thought I would take the time to tell you a little bit about an organization that is very close to my heart.  "Show Hope exists to mobilize individuals and communities to join God's revolution to care for orphans in their distress, helping to provide waiting children with food, shelter, medical care and forever families." Show Hope runs out of Franklin, Tennessee.  They provide orphan care, adoption grants, and have three Special Care Centers based in China that provide specialized medical care for at risk children.  Show Hope's Special Care Centers, such as Maria's Big House of Hope, provide life-giving care for at-risk orphans living with acute medical needs.    There are several ways, through Show Hope's site, that you can support their mission.  They have sponsorships, you can donate supplies, or you can even apply to go on one of their short term trips to care for orphans.  There is a way for e...

This video is a testimony of Katie Davis, the author of Kisses With Katie: A Story of Relentless Love and Redemption .  She gave everything to serve Christ in Uganda.  This book is on my wish list and I cannot wait to read it.  Wow!  What a testimony.  What a great role model for everyone.  She was a teenager when she first went.  A teenager!  Now she is caring for all of these children.  She is their mother.  She is doing exactly what God has called all of us to do.  National Adoption Month  - What are you doing for the orphans in the World?

This month we are studying Thanksgiving, obviously.  We are going to read through Stories of the Pilgrims by Margaret B. Pumphrey.  We are also going to turkey placemats (have I mentioned how much I love my laminator!), and make Pilgrims hats. This month is known for the holiday, Thanksgiving.  But did you know that it is also National Adoption Month?  Adoption is something that is very close to my heart.  So along with studying Thanksgiving, we are going to be learning about orphans and adoption.  I don't want my kids to grow up not knowing about all of the children in the world who don't have forever families.  I pray that as they are learning that their hearts will be filled with a love for orphans and that they will grow up to be an advocate for orphans.  There are a few organizations that provide orphan care that God has placed in front of me. Show Hope is an organization founded by Steven Curtis and Mary Beth Chapman.  Their org...

A friend sent me this link last week and I just got around to watching it in its entirety.  It is extremely moving.  It will make you think.  It will convict you. http://ellerslie.com/Depraved_Indifference.html Mathew 25:31-46  31 - "When the Son of Man comes in His glory, and all the holy angels with Him, then He will sit on the throne of His glory. 32 - All the nations will be gathered before Him, and He will separate them one from another as a shepherd  divides his sheep from the goats. 33 - And He will set the sheep on His right hand, but the goats on His left.  34 - Then the King will say to those on His right hand, 'Come, you blessed of My Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: 35 - for I was hungry and you gave Me food; I was thirsty and you gave Me drink; I was a stranger and you took Me in; 36 - I was naked and you clothed Me; I was sick and you visited Me; I was in prison and you came to Me.' 37 - Th...

In the past few months God has placed orphan care and adoption on my heart.  I have been struggling with the fact that I had a tubal ligation after the twins were born, a decision I regretted almost immediately.  My obstetrician said that it really should be done because of how many caesarian sections I had.  When I had the twins I wasn't right with God.  I didn't consult him on any decisions in my life.  I now know that my husband and I should have consulted the Great Physician instead of the obstetrician. God knows my love for children.  He knows that I desire to have more.  He has turned that desire towards adoption.  My husband and I are in the inquiring stage of adopting a little boy.  If you could see him, his amazing smile, he would light up your day.  At this moment my husband and I don't see how it is possible that we will be able to adopt.  We see road blocks.  We don't necessarily meet the income requirements and w...