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Martha or Mary

Lately I have had to ask myself if I am a Martha or a Mary? Am I so busy trying to serve that I am not listening to what Jesus wants me to hear?

Now it happened as they went that He entered a certain village; and a certain woman named Martha welcomed Him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, who also sat at Jesus' feet and heard His word. But Martha was distracted with much serving, and she approached Him and said, "Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Therefore tell her to help me." And Jesus answered and said to her, "Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things. But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her." Luke 10:38-42

I have been known to say that people need to "step-up" and serve. If I see a need that is not being met, I feel that it is my responsibility to step-up and do it. Do I always ask Jesus first if it is what He wants me to do. No! I figure I am serving and doing work for Him, so I must be doing the right thing.

In the past few months, when I have slowed down enough to listen, God has told me that I am being a Martha. I am not spending time with Him like I should. I am deciding things on my own. I have a huge heart for preschoolers and teaching them about the Word of God. So, if I see a need, I jump right in. I don't think to ask because, after all, I am teaching children about their Heavenly Father. How could that be wrong? It is wrong because I am not asking God first if I am the one He wants to do it. I am not asking Him if it is what He wants me to do with my time. I am not asking Him if this is the way He wants me to serve. I am not asking Him if this is the work He has for me to do. I don't consider what God wants when I decide where to serve.

Did you catch that, "I" decide where to serve. Although my whole heart is in teaching and I am teaching about our Heavenly Father, it is not God who is putting me there, it is me. A few months back I was asked to consider going on a missions trip to Romania this past July. I said yes. I thought that God was saying yes, but the more time I spend with Him, I realize it was me saying yes, not Him. I was so frustrated when it didn't work out. I was embarrassed because I had told the whole congregation that I was going to go. It took me awhile to realize that I didn't really ask God, I just saw a need and decided to step-up and do it. It was a hard lesson to learn, but I needed to learn it.

It is my prayer that I will spend more time sitting at Jesus' feet and listening to Him and what plans He has for me. It is my prayer that I will spend less time "stepping-up" when He is not telling me to. It is my prayer that God will soften my heart to His will.

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